Cheat Engine

[Randizzle]

then discuss

Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She asked him what he wanted for his upcoming birthday, and he said he just wanted to hang out with her and watch a movie or two. I thought it was sweet, so I asked my boyfriend what he would like for his upcoming birthday. He said a blow job. FML


Today, I realised that my glade plug-in air freshner lasts longer than any of my relationships have. FML

Today, I decided I didn't care about my pride, and so I asked this girl out in a text. After an hour of no responce I asked again. Later I got a text saying, "I'm sorry, This is Emily's mom. Emily isn't here at the moment, but if I were you, I wouldn't ask again." I was rejected by her mom. FML



Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She proceeded to say, "I wanna break your collar bone." in a seductive tone. FML

Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML

Today, I had a terrible dream where my boyfriend cheated on me with his ex. I woke up almost crying and called him just to tell him how much he means to me. Turns out my dream gave him that little extra push he needed to confess he's been cheating on me. With his ex. FML



Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a moment pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you to." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML